for all the haters out there.. copycatters.... cheap bitches... streetwhores... and ugly fuckers..

:))

this is specially for u..
only u and no 1 else..

u shud feel honoured that i write a post specially about u...
no 1 wud waste so much time for u peeps..

excpt for me ofcourse..
as a thx for always be there besides me to mock n say shit bout me...
:)
THNK YOU...

to all the haters...
thnk u for hating me...
it makes me feel more happy than i am,,..
why?
cuz ur making it easy for me to pick my friends...

and and and!!

to all the SECRET haters....
who hate me behind my back...
hahaha
thats just so lame...
but yeah.. what the heck ryte??
keep on hiding urself...
pretending infront of me..
i caught some of ur kind already..
haha its not that hard really...
so sad that ur face expression are just too obvious..
no talent for u to be an actress or actor...
so.. keep hating k?

to the pitiful copycatters..

awwww...
thats so cute...
trying to copy me dontcha?
ur life must be really sad and pathetic that u WISH u hav my life...
u want the attntion ryte?
u want people to notice u dontcha?
sokay3...
keep copying...
LOL...
to bad tho.. cuz the fact is..
u can nver be the real me cuz theres only ONE FADZLIN HANIS BINTI HAJI RAMLI..
:))

cheap bitches...
this is sad...
are u that desperate to hav the guy that i date with?
go go go..
take it... :)
i have plenty more to keep..
it wont stop...
so go on n hav em k?
IF THEY WANT U....
seldom people choose cheap bitch as their life partner...
hurm... best of luck! :)

streetwhore...

sell ur body cuz thats the only asset u hav,,
:)
why does it related to me ryte?
well.... cuz i personally hate this kind of people..
so why not just say it aswell..

ugly fuckers...

maybe ur hot..
but ugly heart makes an ugly face..
:)
dont think that u hv the look then u can take control of everything..
god is almighty...
He'll take away what u hav in a nick of time..

trying hypnotise people by ur look..
maybe thats all u got..
well guys..
girls are quite materialist...
if u dont hav the brain.. its still a no no...
if u got the brain n the looks..
then its a plus...
so be brilliant peeps..
dont think that huge dick can change anything...
IT WONT...

jar of heart...

I know I can't take one more step towards you
Cause all that's waiting is regret
And don't you know I'm not your ghost, anymore
You lost the love I loved the most
I learned to live half alive
And now you want me one more time
And who do you think you are
Running 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are
I hear you're asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms
And learn to live half alive
And now you want me one more time
And who do you think you are
Running 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are
Dear, it took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
Cause you broke all your promises
And now you're back
You don't get to get me back
And who do you think you are
Running 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Don't come back at all
And who do you think you are
Running 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?

this song has a lot of meaning into it..

hatred..

love...

hurt...

regrets..

a guy who hurts her feeling and yet dont feel anything..

a guy who wonder around flirting every other girls and break their heart aswell..

a guy who thought he cud hav her back after what he had done to her...

a guy who is shameless n heartless,,,...

 

she was hurt by him...

she loved him too much that she hav to suffer for quite a long time..

 just when she about to forget him..

he came back asking her to love him again..

he thought she will still want him back cuz he knws her weakness..

her weakness is HIM..

he dont knw what he has made out of her..

what had she changed into when he left her...

she has become stronger...

she has unblindfold herself from the blindness that he had made towards her..

she can live without him nw...

he shud knw..

his jar of hearts has broken..

her heart has been found again..

now..

she's letting him live half alive..

let him knw how she felt when he left her..

she's holding a jar..

containing a heart..

now..

she's wondering around..

looking for other victims..

thats what she has become..

she has become the new him.

im not fond to it but i have to face it..

theres too many things im not fond to..
but then...
i have to accept them cuz its just how it is..

i even thought of trying to change them.,..
but then.. whats my right?
im not perfect...
im no good..
i do stuff that irritates people too..
so might as well leave them be...

seriously..
im not fond to people thats too emotional..
i dont really like it...
its show how obvious they dont knw how to control themselves..
how they cant manage their emotion well...

DOESNT MEAN IM NOT THAT KIND OF PEOPLE..

i do get pissed off infront of people sometime...
i do shout when i can control my emotions...

but i didnt do it often n i always regrets of what i done n try not to do it again..
so nw whenever i dont feel good or in A BAD mood...
i'll just shut my mouth... so i wont shout or put out my anger...

im not happy when people treat other people like shit because they thought they can..
cuz people who treat other people like shit are the ACTUAL SHIT...
curse people because u intend to do so instead of wanting to just joke around..
those kind of people worth go to hell...
U DESERVE IT.. :)


i do curse at people...
i did say BABI,,, BODOH.. CIBAI.... ANJING.... SIAL... FUCK.....
but eventually...
it all came out out of jokes...
kidding around... n i ALWAYS MAKE SURE PEOPLE ARE NOT OFFENDED...
excpt for maia...
i dont really care if i offend her cuz eventually..
she gonna irritate me somehow.. in ANYWAY SHE CUD,...
n i have to accpt the fact that thats my gurl...
hahaha

BUT BITCH.. I LOVE U.. <3

i dont like people to be angry of what mistake other people do when they actually do it way more often...
this kind of people..
they usually see other people's mistakes when they dont look at the mirror and see their own mistakes..
judge as if they'r perfect...
IRRITATING....

fakers..
u shud KILL URSELF...
i hav to admit...
i do fake around sometime..
but not most of the time..
i fake when i think i shud...
but this kind of people... who love to be fake....
they just didnt noticed that they hav this "IM FAKE" sign on their head..
they didnt noticed that people knw they'r fake...
face can show everythng...

BACKSTABBER,,
i faced this kind of shit THE MOST...
i hate this kind of shit the most!
im dealing with this kind of deepshit almost everyday!
when we believe n we gav our trust..
they backstabbed us..
and eventually hoping for forgiveness when we knw that eventually they still gonna backstabbd us..
more suck is when they'r the 1 who bcome pissed cuz we dont forgive them...
=="
perangai mcm sial ini jgn la diamalkan yer...
xsihat...

tak tahu malu..
what type of shameless people do i mean?
when they wear skirts and sit with their legs spread widely..
showing of some "hair" n their undies.
YUCKS....
been there.. seen that...
i feel like im in hell for a moment..
GOD...
and eventually... this person hates me for being my hyper self..
=="
better hyper than what u did gurl...

FINALLY... (FOR NW)
i hate people that think whats right for other people..
how?
they'r the 1 who be the judge whether a person shud be another person's partner...
they'r the 1 who be the judge whether the person shud wear the outfits or not...
whther they shud say what they wanna say or not..

=="

fuck off...

if u think ur perfect enough..
go be god..

im not fond to this kind of things..
but eventually....
I HAV TO FACE THEM...
cuz its life..
no 1 is perfect..
im not perfect..

i do lots of shit aswell...
but then...
the shit i do...
is not as shitty as what im talking bout...

judge me?
go ahead...
deal with those kinds of people since i was born...
bitch?
i am a bitch...
any probs?


bye.
 

i forgot who i am..

i use to knw what its all about to be in my own shoes..
now im wondering..
who's shoes am i wearing..
y isnt it as comfortable as it use to?

i always debate bout myself to myself!
use to..
wondering why...?
cuz if i dont...
i'll long gone forgotten who i want to be n what i live for in my life..

which thats what happening now..
im little by little being amnesia bout who i am..
i hav forgotten my duty as a survent of ALLAH.... follower of Prophet Muhammad... daughter of my parents.. sister of my siblings... friend of my friends... and students of my teachers...

i never thought that i will become this way..
i nver knw that i will ever change..
I DONT WANNA CHANGE!
i dont want to be the weird one!!!

i dont want to wear some elses shoes other than mine!~!!!!

all i want is to be me..
some1 who dont wanna care if its none of my business..
some1 who wud care if its the person i care most..
some1 who still remmber who i am and where i actually stand..

God...
i dont want to change...
i dont want to be some busy body bitch who wanna knw everything..
i dont want to ignore the person when i actually care bout them..
i dont want to forget who i am and become snobbish n proud..

i just want to be me..
:'(

regrets.

there are so much that we regret about...
we think about it again and again but in the end..
we can nver turn back time...
even if we do hav a machine that are made to go to the past n fix the mstakes that we done..
faith has decided whats what.... and in the end... almost the same mistakes will happnd..
just in a diffrnt way..

do u hav any regrets on anything?

dont lie cuz honest people usually learnt from their mistakes faster than people who deny the truth..

for me...
i've been regretting about so many things that its countless...
regrets for argueing with my siblings..
regrets for pissing people off..
regrets of disappointing alot of people...
REGRET ON NOT BEING HONEST THAT I LIKED HENRY..
regret on hurting alot of feelings..
regret on still doing it to certain people..
regret for not taking care of the kitten that it got hit by care.. :'(
n regret hoping for something that cud not happn until this hour...

n ofcourse..
regret on not being the best as a slave of Allah...

this regrets...
we all need to face them..
cuz this regrets cud lead us to the greatest strength that we had...
it opend our eyes.. widden them... make u see what lies beneath all of them...
i knw certain regrets may be ur scar until nw..
but better to feel regret than not feel any of this kind of feelings dont u think?
we become more greatful of what we have...

n so...
i am admitting...

i regret on knwing u.

 not u my beloved classmate...
ur my crush till forever..
hahahha

what i knw about this "love" word today... only today... :)

this is not speaking from experience..
this is speaking from what i felt inside...
what really matter nw is what my heart want to let out..
i knw LOVE is not cruel...
i knw LOVE has more to it than how it is..
n i knw..
LOVE is everywhere and exist among every1 n evey human n every creature in this planet...
1 thing for sure..
MY LOVE FOR GOD N FAMILY IS TRUE..

what my feeling told me nw...
he said my believe in love has slowly fade..
cuz my heart say...
"love" in ur brain dictionary has changed..
it is not the old "love" that u believed in anymore...
the description of love in the brain dictionary states that ;
what lies between love is lie...
what believes shud been written in love is disloyalty...
what happiness which was said about love, it is actually sadness..
what craziness love cud make is actually uncontrol madness..

u deny it?

when we start this so called love..
we believe that this is a new start for us..
a new beginning of a new life..
we rely on our partner in giving us every single breath that we take...
we gave all our soul n heart, believing them to take good care of it...
we share all the secrets that even alien cud nver find out, knwing that we wud swallow the key just because the secret was ours...
we respect them cuz we knw they'd do the same to us..
believing that they'd turned into superman..
to protect our dignity... virginity... mentally.. physically...

when we feel this love we felt..
we're we ready for the outcome?
did we knw that what the turn out will be...


"i dont care about anything as long as i hav u!"
"i will never leave u cuz ur the beat of my heart"
"i promised u i'll protect u till my last breath"
 n the last but not least...
"i promise u that i'll make u as my wife n we will be togther forever.."

those phrases..
those phrases are like black ribbons with white printed words..
blind folded u..
leaving u blind with no stick to walk...
u believed...
loyal...
trust...
n love...

u dont mind what happnd to u...
cuz u thought it was because ur facing true love..
u thought its because thats how love shud be..
leaving u blind...
giving all ur trust for him...
u thought...
"i still hav his hand to held on to cuz i knw he will never leave me.."

but he didnt...

he left u...
for a glass of water cuz he was thirsty..
but who cares..
he didnt kept his promise didnt he..?
did he STAY BY UR SIDE TILL THE END?
he said he wud die for u but wait..
he's taking a break drinking water leaving u blind!
U DONT HAV A STICK RMMBER?
UR COUNTING ON HIM!
U BELIEVED HIM!!
U GAVE ALL UR FREAKING TRUST FOR HIM!!!!

so what nw?
haha i knw...

"its ok.. it was just because he's thirsty... he's ryte beside me nw.. thats what matters..."

ur blind folded and few girls past by..
u see what he's doing?

*wink at a girl RYTE INFRONT OF U but u WERE BLIND FOLDED..


"its okay.... he's a guy... thats what guys always do..."

this is where u had been fooled...
u knw what ur facing but u still want to face it..
u want him to see ur love for him..
u want him to knw no matter what.. u'r still gonna be with him..
be there for him...
die for him...
do anything for him...

this is where ur already become literally blind..
no need the blind fold anymore...
ur now standing on a quicksand...
waiting to die..
while he stand there looking at u sinking..
dying..
lifeless...

him..
he's smiling...

y did i say that?

who's the 1 that suppost to be the superman??
u or him?
ur backing up his dignity...
not saving his virginity but then..
u take care of him mentally n physically..
dont want him to be harm while u'd die for him...

thats when ur not safe anymore..
love is red ryte?
hahaha

yeah...
suits u when ur blood flown out from ur eyes..
ur mouth..
ur nose,,
when u were eaten by maggets.,.

y?
because u believe in love too much...
LOVE THAT U SEE?
ahhahaa

look again..
with 4D spec..

analys again...
go check thro alien techno...

think again..
u hav ur head..
dont use ur knee to think..
it doesnt work..

yeah.. thats what i knw bout love today...
:)
meaningless..

i only believe n 2 love that i knw will nver ever3 ditch me...
love for MY RELIGION.. MUSLIM..
n love for my FAMILY..

i believe in them...
if im a fool for that..
i dont mind..
cuz im a fool for my own blood n for my own GOD..

:))

my most awesome fabulous holiday baby!! ahakz! loving it! XD (1st epi!)

my awesome holiday started when my dad being A-OK after his surgery!!!
was awfully worried bout him cuz he gone thro a quite lot of surgeries b4..

im sure y he's better nw is because he dont want to leave he's precious daughter all alone lifeless without him!! :))
i love love love love love love u daddy!!! *tears...

check out from SMC building with RM8700 as the payment.. as long as my dad is ok.. nothing is as expensive as he's life to us...

seriously... I LOVE MY DADDY!!!!

*funny moment in the hospital!
andy (cousin) : uncle.. knp x mkn??
daddy : uncle xsuka makanan hospital... andy... pg bngkuskan uncle nc bryani k? :) dkt jothy tmpat api2 tue k??
andy : jadi makanan uncle nie?
daddy : ko mkn.. meh cni! mkn nie... ko lom mkn kan? makan nie.. nah! buah! mkn mkn mkn! 


==" daddy.. sakit2 pun mgidam kah?
pastu pndai lg suruh org laen mkn mknan dia..


the next meal arrived....
sure la dady xmkn pnya kan....
me : daddy.. hanis mkn la nie buah k? :) (smbil tunjuk buah tmbikai yg hosp provide..)
daddy : mkn la! 
yum yum yum....
me : is it me or tmbikai nie pun rasa mcm ubat.. xda flavour tmbikai lgsung...
mummy : kan awk d hospital.... ingat dia maen bg psakit mkn mknan sedap kah?? tmbikai tue pun d suntik ubat jgk..
me : kenapa mummy xckp dri td??
mummy : awk tue pun berpnyakit jgk! xpndai nak mkn mknan sihat! bgs la tue awk mkn tmbikai tue! kc hbs tue!
me dlm otak : mnyesal aq mkn.....


dah dah dah! toksah dok ckp bnda yg bwt aq risau.
(risau plak mcmana daddy kue skg... mummy n adik just went back to tawau n he's all alone again.. hurh.... seriously... im damn worried...)

disebabkan dady saya rock dan kuat... he's ok after 2 days of rest..
PLUS! lpas mkn masakan my mom...
serious! after he ate my mom's cooking.. its like he's stronger than ever,, ahhaa

he dont wanna make us worried...
so dia suruh kitorang g jalan2.. CASH PROVIDED.. :)) kaching2...
we went somewhere n go shopping when suddenly..

andy : mo kah kmu maen jetski?
me, sisters : mau!!! 
andy : aq ada kwn.. ley kc murah.. byr minyak jetski tue jak! 
me n sis : ok.. jom sok kita pg...!


the next day...
mummy ajak g tmpat laen... xjadi pg..
==" ndak ko kecewa + hampa + mcm-mo-mraung-dlm-ati+ mo tikam2 tue beg pasir ??
ndakpa.. ndakpa.... lama lg cuti nie....
ingatkan ari tue ari yg pling worst kunun.. tgk c mummy maen boling ma crew perkep dia yg bru.. ahhaa
maen boling..
mummy kue..
ahahahhahahaa
(tgk2 byk jgk jatuh pin tue.. bley tahan c mummy.. diam2 ubi berisi.. chee.. peribahasa gtu! ahaha)
bosan tgk c mummy maen bowling.... trus aq suruh c kakak bwa jalan.... trun bwah....
c kakak pun membalas..
: awk nak jalan.... awk gtau mummy..
me : aq lagi............... mmg mgsa.... ahaha
tapi ndakpa.... lpas jak tnya.. kmi trus blah!
c andy jadi mgsa meneman c mummy...

*lupa crita agenda pnting 1 hari b4...
di pjbt daddy.. melepak...
daddy : nah... bli la hp yg awak nak beli tue..
hand in 2k..
me : erk?? thx daddy!
(time ckp tue xtunjuk excited sgt tapi dlm hati mcm mercun.. kalah2 mercun CNY..)
dgn kesempatan ini ingin saya ucapkan selamat thu bru cina kepada rakan2 n keluarga cina sesat yg tersyg.. :) angpow lai lai!

sambungan...
so turun tue dgn purse buncit.. psal ada cash dlm purse.. berjalan la kami,...
jalan punya jalan.. ter pause d satu kedai hp nie..
bley tahan jgk pengkid nie.. gila comel!
ok.... bkn itu sebenarnya aq tertarik at 1st...
aq just ternmpk hp idaman hati... *bunyi background... haaaaaaaa~~~~
blackberry torch.....
jadi tnpa berlengah2.. tnya harga.. runding harga....
bli la hp itu on the spot.. :)


*agenda time beli hp..
satu mamat buncit : hai cik adik...
me : heeeh?
mamat buncit : tgk sebelah kiri cik... lelaki cina tue kirim salam dgn cik..
me : (tgk tmpat yg dtnjuk...) oh.. 
mamat buncit : bye cik adik...
me : erm.. yer ler...
sambung tgk hp baru...
excited bha nie....
(btw.. c mummy ndak tau ank bertuahnya nie bli hp bru.. miahahahha)

the next day of the next day... mksudnya the next day lg larh.. ahhaa
siap2 mo g shopping LAGI!
bju pun santik nie!
pki jeans n evrything!
siap mekap tebal 5 inci!

me : ndak jadi lg pg maen jetski.. :'(
andy : ya la tue mgkin...
sis, andy : hanis! pg tnya daddy! kan ank tersyg... hehehe
me : kmu bab2 mnyuruh cpat ar!


me: daddy... kitorang mo g maen jetki n mo g pulau mamutik.. bley?
daddy : pg la?? daddy mau g pjbt.. kmu pg la! pg pg pg! :))
me : btul nie daddy? wohooo!!!


(disebabkan sudden event.. kmi berlari naek atas capai apa jak yg ada kaitan dgn pntai n air... n we'r set to go!)

lpas jak hantar dady g pjbt.. c kakak pg bli mknan dan minuman.. aq pg mengurus BLACKBERRY BARU KUE.. ahaha mc jakun2 but aq paduli apa! pg digi mengurus digi plan..

maka... kami pun pg ke jeti d kk tue.. lupa sua aq namanya. lantak...
smua org memerhati gerak geri kmi 3 bradik n c andy..

ingat kan apa....
rupanya pelik...
kami nie mo g shopping kah mo g berenang nie... =="

kitorang g maen jetski dl...
nie yg best aq crita nie...

I LOVE SPEED.. LOVE2 SPEED DAMNLY..
i speed when i drive..
i speed when i run..
i speed when i type..
i speed when i ans quest..
smua speed3..
another new speed that i love is jetski..
gila lah!!!!

aq naek dl..
tukar seluar d atas deck tue..
teda tutup nya..
maka aq pki towel tukar..
ndakkan mo b'jeans kan.. bongok jgk.. =="
1st org tue yg bwk...
aq jd pnumpang...
kurang asam.. pnya maen bagoyang tue jetski da bwa...
ndak laju but bergoyang2..
so konon aq kena hug da la supaya ndak jatuh..
IN UR DREAM FUCKA!
aq pgg tali lifejacket mue tue dah cukup...
:)

my turn to drive the wheel without wheel.. get it?? ahahhahahahaha
anyway..
bls dendam time!
fullspeed.!!

drive mcm org sasau!
lawan ombak!
(pegangan c jantan makin kuat pada tali life jacket kue... nsb da ndak peluk.. lau ndak.. aq lempar da msk laut!)
owh! laut itu aq yg punya!
gila la!

then aq bwa c andy plak..
(andy x pndai berenang btw..)
nsb aq kc ingat da pki life jacket..
knp??

nie la nie aq mo crita nie...

tidak kurang beza cara aq dri jetski tue...
mcm org sasau jgk!
ahahhaha
andy xpgg kuat...
maka time aq bwt corner.. (mcm ada simpang t junction kan..)
c andy mo jatuh.. bwt aq pun hmpir jatuh tapi aq xjatuh..
c andy jatuh..
aq jauh dri tmpat da jatuh dgn jetski kue..

reminder.. andy dont knw how tue swim....

HANIS!!!! HANIS!! blupp.. bluppp..

aq dari jauh ketawa mo mmpus!!
ahahahahhahahahhaha
jahat kah??
bkn jahat..
tapi lawak gila wei!!!
DAH ADA LIFE JACKET PUN MC LAGI TREP LEMAS!!!

lpas dia sedar dia ada life jecket..
bru dah calmer ckit..
pastue da bwt lawak lg..
da xpndai berenang...
so time da bwt aksi berenang..
da d coordinate yg sama!
bahahhahahahahhahahahahahahah!!
punya la!!!

nsb ada jetski yg dinaiki ole zila jadi pnyelamat..
bodoh3...
gila lawak..
ahhahahahhaa

then kami g pulau...
berenang tepi pntai..
lawan berenang dgn andy..
which ofcourse i won.. ==" ahhaha
best la segalanya..

even time blek.. boat yg kami naek bwt aksi mcm da tue jetski..
laju n terhuyung hayang dri kiri ke kanan! ahhahahah awesome dowh!
mmg terbaek punya cuti la nie!!!!

sambungan da nnti aq bg ar... :) penat menaip!