I can officially say that i have been through friendship life for 17 years since i was 2? 3? 4? Well, since i kind of forgot how friendship was back when i was 2 and 3, i'll start when i was 4 years old then. :)
Remember those days? When you finally get to go to school and you're so excited about it that you can't stop talking about it? Can't wait meeting new friends and study in class and play with friends and go around with friends and study with friends again (LOL). In my situation, back then, i only love recess and i hate classes. BUT! i was a very hard working young girl. WAS. Back in kindergarden, i always get bullied by a fat girl sitting beside me. Always pinched me when she gets the chance to do so. Then there's this boy who loves to steal toys that my dad bought for me so i hate him so much that i called my dad to school just to scold him. Teehee.
(memories..)
I remember the moment when i wake up in the morning, dad will be the one who's responsible on bathing me while mom will make the breakfast. What he'll do was that he put a basin of water and put A TONES of soap in there so that i'll be interested to have my bath and play with bubbles. Imagine my dad do that every day just so that i'm comfortable. :'(
So every morning, mom will make me two super yummy milk (in baby bottle), one is when i'm at home as my breakfast, and another one is for me to drink in car. I'll always lay my head on my dad's thigh while drinking my milk and he'll be driving me to school. And when we arrived, i'll be crying and refusing to go because of the bully in my class. I didn't like friends much back then.
Then there's my neighbour, annoying little bitch. I can officially say that all of my siblings and cousins hate her. How could she called my dad, daddy aswell?? unforgivable! Best part was when we were playing in this huge drain near our house, catching little frogs, she was standing near the drain so my cousin and me kind of pushed her into the drain and we ran like crazy! The satisfaction was just amazing. hahaha
So this was why i hated being friend with anyone when i was younger. The only friends that i want to be with was my siblings and my cousins. Even though i'm friend with my cousins, we have our moments when we argue for no reasons just cause we hate looking at each other's face.
when i was 6, dad got his promotion so we moved from Kota Kinabalu to Tawau.
Back then, i remembered my arguement with my cousins because of some unknown reasons. We end up hitting each other so hard. If i'm not mistaken, it was 2 vs 1. My cousins vs me. (I lived with my aunt back then cause my house wasn't fully renovated yet) I think what makes us really close was when i had my high fever. I was too sick for school and i remember myself walking like a drunk person. Dad bought me my favourite rice cracker. I gave my cousins some of them and we got close right after that. :) That was when i start knowing that there's also different kinds of friends.
In school, although i was 6, my dad sent me to primary one just because i studied in early age, but because of my still too immature attitude, i always eat in class and annoy the teacher, after few months, i went back to kindergarden. Lol. Then i met more new friends. One of my friends that i always hung out with love to steal things from me. Though i know about it, i still wants to be friend with her just because i thought thats just her attitude. hehehe
Therefore, i found out that this is when i could accept friends though they just wanted to take advantage out of me. I found out that all i need was new stuffs or foods to have new friends.
So up from 7 to 12, my primary school moments, i found that i can 'Clique' with male friends rather than girl friends. i remember having only two close girl friends back then. But for guys, there were a lot of them to start with. Played around mostly with guys almost everyday was more fun than having stupid girl talk in class.
I remembered when every time i argued with my girl friends, even if it was my mistake, they'll be the one who apologize to me. It all end up that there was reasons for their behaviour. i know right? kecil2 dah pandai bodek.
There was this incident when one of my guy friend was joking around with me with inappropriate act, so i told Ustaz about it and BOTH of us end up getting scold by him. hahaha
Ustaz said: "Hanis, jangan la selalu sangat main dengan kawan laki, tak bagus tue..."
But since i was too comfortable with guys, i still end up hanging around with the same group of guys.
This was when i decide to make more guy friends than girl friends. Its not like girls understand me. Plus its more fun playing with guys than girls.
Then there was high school. This was when all the fun starts.
I was a very snobbish girl. Since i was in 1A, i feel inferior for a second. The only person i started being friend with was Phoebe Pang. Yeap, my first friend who sat beside me whom i also found out that she studied in Sk ST Patrick which means she don't write Chinese well. I remembered how great it was when we would write letters to each other even though she sat only beside me.
When i looked at every other students which was not from my class, i'll be glaring than looking at them with a smile. When i applied for Prefect, i was responsible for taking care 1C class. That was when i met Miss Syarifah Maimunah, Miss Nurul Zanariah, and Miss Nurul Fathnie. Still, i was snobbish as ever. And to make it more fun, they hated me too. They hate me a lot. People like Valenny, Dayang, Iman also started hating me before we starts being friends.
the 1st person i got close to was Fathnie. All thanks to Persatuan Sej dan Geo. Then there's Iman. All thanks to Prefect. There was Valenny who started hating me cause she thought i steal her boyfriend which was actually my best friend back then and when she broke up with him, then he became my boyfriend. Teehee Me and Vel and Dayang end up being good friends. Before i got close to Fathnie by the way. Then Dayang moved to Kota Kinabalu which leaves me, Fathnie and Vel.
Before knowing all the other girls other than Phoebe, i got to know guy friends from form 2. We end up being so close because they knew my elder brother. :) There were 5 of them if i'm not mistaken and all of them were B-Boy. breakdancers. So i always spend my break either with Phoebe or my guy friends. That was when Vel started thinking that i steal her boyfriend cause one of the guy was her boyfriend, Fletcher.
In form 2, we have our annual sports day where everyone will take part in doing sports and such. That was when i got close to Chie(syarifah) and Zana(Nurul). It was partly because of Fathnie whom was Chie's classmate and Zana was Chie's long term best friend since they were in primary and another part of the reason was because we have our marching event for each one of our 'rumah sukan' = team.
Since then, i never parted with them, ever. We go everywhere almost everyday, talked almost everything, text almost every time. Don't ever think that there was no conflict between us. We argued sometimes. There was once about something that involved one of the friend members. But it then settled after we had our meeting. How glad. But i end up not being close to that friend anymore just because i don't believe her anymore.(now we're friend once again.. :) )
I learnt that i can end friendship and friends has become more meaningful to me. I enjoyed every moment that we had and never regret once of all the things that had happened to us.
In form 3, i get to know Her. She was such an innocent little thing. Really sincere of being friend with Her that without knowing what happened, i end up hanging with Her most of my time rather than hanging out with my own bestfriends. I even have my recess time with Her instead of the others. We get along pretty well that little by little, we get to know each secrets. I'll be worrying about Her while She did the same to me. She finally gets to know some other friends and some how after a while, i found out She has conflict with my friend's sister. Then i found out my bestfriends was so worried about me. There was even time when Chie wrote something on Friendster that touched me and has showed me how she cared si much about me.
My bestfriends have becomed my everything. They are the one i want to be with no matter what and they will always be the one i held on to till the end.
Time passes... Skipped form 4..(too lazy to write now.. ;p)
But in short, thanks to tuition, I got to know MJ. They are my guyfriends whom i still held on to till the very end as well. my precious guy friends who always brings me to the dark side and pull be back to the bright side when they feel like it.
When i was in form 5. I went through a lot of drama from school, tuition and even home. I went through a very tough time that eventually made me feel thankful of what i had gone through. There was a moment when i had problem with guy that causes caotic incident. The girl i got to know back in form 3 was the same tuition with him. Something that She said has causes me so much pain. That was when i felt so betrayed and i feel more hurtful when i found out that she only came clean to when after she found out that i know about her telling him what meant to be our secret.
Anger control most of me, so i made a stupid act out of it. Her secrets leak just like that. The betrayed that i felt was too hurtful that i made something worse.
There was a side of me that i found out so unforgivefully mean. I shouldn't had done what i have done. It haunt me till this day. It seems that i cant take betrayal that calmly and i cant accept the fact that if i gave all my trust to that someone, they ended up breaking my heart and my trust just like that without thinking twice of what friendship means.
memories...
It was SPM. We were having our 4 hour break before our next Islamic Paper. MJ and Eunnicials end up going to town having the time of our life eating and hanging around in mall eating as if it was already holidays. we ate takoyaki, drank hot chocolate, ate chicken butter rice, and finally went back to college one hour before our paper. There was even picture of us walking to school. It was kind of crazy but because of this crazy things that we done, it made us closer and it gives me memories i can never erase.
Here, i already concluded that for girls, it was better to be friend with someone i already know for years rather than someone i get to know not longer cause they end up being a disappointment in the end. While for guys, it doesn't matter how long it took for you to get to know them, for me, once you know them, and appreciates them as a true friend, they goint to treat you the same aswell.
bye highschool and hi college!
Just when i thought drama end when i step foot out from my high school.
I met this girl whom at 1st hate me. (As if i'm not use to it..) She thought i wanted to steal her ideal man. But because of this one event we had, it has made us closer. The next thing you know, we became best friend for life. LOL. Plus, her bestfriend was my classmate and i somehow treat miss classmate as my close friend already. It was because of the time when i cried and she was the one who comfort me. :)
I remembered.
After a while knowing and getting to know her, i find that there's bad side of her. Well, everyone have there own bad sides right, i have mine too, so i decide to just accept her flaws cause nothing can stop us being friends. THATS WHAT I THOUGHT.
I find that i become closer and closer to Maia. The next thing you know, i end up spending most of my time with her rather than my 1st bestfriend. So slowly, little by little, there become a gap between me and 1st bff. She noticed the distance and after a while she became friend with my schoolmate. I didn't mind it at all, until one day my schoolmate glare at me and it seems like she doesn't even want to look at me at all. Something wrong somewhere. I never had problems with her, what the heck happening here.
So truth came out that she talks nonsense about me. Interesting ex bff. :) I became closer to my schoolmate, plus the twins, plus mr Indian and his wife, shawty Maia, miss smarty ass, mr smarty ass and lately, i have become closer to miss Kota Kinabalu. There's just things t\about ms KK that i admire about. Stay awesome Miss KK. There's also miss cheerleaders, i had fun hanging out dancing with you girls. Mr hunks dodgers, all so hot and spicy. For teaching me dodgeball skills which i still fail till the very end, thank you. :)
Though i know no one will actually finish reading this, still i have my dedication to my beloved bestfriends around the globe(just Malaysia actually and some part of the world..)
For being honest to me, always cheer me up, always tells me my flaws and yet accepting them, for being patient dealing with my annoying attitude, not forgetting to those who backstabbed me which eventually made me stronger, for saying all the nonsense about me which made me think twice before doing anything, and for bestfriends whom still stands next to me to the very end,
thank you so much. If i could, i would bring you guys to everywhere i go but i know everyone has their own path to go to, be healthy anywhere you are, don't miss me too much, think of me when you have time, have some lunch with me when you're free, catch up with me through phones every time you get the chance and lastly, make sure to treasure our friendship as how it is.
While for my opinion on friendship,
It's worth understanding what friends is all about. It may hurt most of the times when they tease you, when some backstabbed you, when another crushed you. These kinds of feelings are like relationship between boyfriend and girlfriend, you need to understand to control them well. And when you finally manage everything, you'll know who is your friend and foe are.
ADAKAH ORANG MO BACA POST KUE NIE? ==" PANJANG BEBENO LA PULOK.
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